Top Stories:

Block 7 Lab Assignments Announced

Arkansas Physician Uses ìSurgical Duct Tapeî

     The city of Little Rock has been in the news for its politicians, but not very frequently for advances in medical sciences.  Dr. Daryl Bennett has attracted national attention for his use of duct tape in surgical procedures...

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Pre-Acceptance Program Secures Missouri Grant

COLUMBIA, MO ñ In a press release Thursday, Dean William Crist, Dean of Medical Education at the University of Missouri, announced that MU Medical Schoolís Bryant Scholars program is the grateful recipient of a 10 year, $10 million state grant...

Cloning Facility Found in McKeown Basement

In a surprise raid on Saturday, federal agents discovered a rudimentary cloning facility in the basement of third year medical student Simon McKeown.  According to the agency's report, Mr. McKeown and his wife had been splicing DNA in hopes of creating a set of superhumans. 

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Curriculum:

Sketching a Line to Reform:

-Bernie Beitman: Psychiatrist, family man, lecture illustrator

Before attending medical school at Yale University and completing his residency at Stanford, Beitman spent several months in New York City, pursuing his dream of becoming a professional lecture illustrator.

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PBL Tutors Say: Letís Kill Two

Medical school commissioner Michael Hosokawa announced plans today for contraction, with two labs to be eliminated before the start of the 2002 school session, or block six.

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OME Introduces "Commemorative Hat Day" to Increase Attendance at Wrap-up

Citing a record slump in attendance, the Office of Medical Education announced that it would be giving away commemorative hats to the first 25 students at the next M2 case wrap-up.

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Letter's to the Editor:

World News:

Peru Threatens Lengthy Objectives with Covert Military Force

IQUITOS, PERU ñ Negotiations between the decades-old trade partners, the Peruvian Logging Industry and the American Paper Association, were abandoned Saturday when officials could not reach a mutually agreeable...

Society:

Class of 2004 Struggles with Sense of Identity

COLUMBIA, MO ñ The members of the MU Medical School class of 2004 have something more important than just schedules in common.  Every student in this class of 92 feels the burden of a single, pervasive, yet infamous reputation.  That is, the label handed to them by the class of 2003 as being ìUn-Cool.î ...

Medical Student Discovers Power of Invisibility in Resident Clinic

Third year medical student Mark Hamblin has had a funny feeling about himself for years.  Mr. Hamblin is not like the rest of us.  He has been given a gift.  You see, Mr. Hamblin can make himselfÖ invisible.

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Class of 2004 Has Crush on Melissa Logan

It is now official. The class of 2004 is smitten with Melissa Logan, Medical Student Coordinator for the department of psychiatry and neurology.

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Sports:

MU Sports Report by Mark Pogemiller  

For six years, I have attended the University of Missouri.  I have put my blood, sweat, and tears into supporting this schoolís sporting events, with very little in return.  In particular, I have observed the football team with heavy scrutiny. 

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Lifestyles:

Results of the Patrick Runnels Look-A-Like contest