Editorial:

I swear, I will never do this again

 

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ Hey thanks a lot guys for seeing me in the ER tonight.Ý I swear that I will never do anything like this again.Ý And youíre right, I might have a drinking problem.Ý I mean yeah I see the errors of my way and I need to change some things around in my life.Ý Iím sorry Iím so drunk.Ý I swear that I will never do this again.

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ Thanks for stitching up my head.Ý I think I fell down or something.Ý Iím turning over a new leaf, youíll see man.Ý I mean you wonít see because I wonít be back in here.Ý I mean I might be back in here if I get stabbed or have cancer or something.Ý Not that Iím going to get stabbed or anything.Ý But I swear that you will never see me all shit-faced like this.Ý I didnít mean to cuss, Iím sorry about that, but thatís how Iím feeling right now.

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ You guys are the real heroes in the world.Ý I mean doctors are like saints to the people in this country and I really respect all that you guys do for guys like me.Ý I know that you are a medical student, but youíll make a great doctor someday.Ý I know these things.Ý I could tell the minute you walked in that you were going to be a great doctor.Ý You might cure cancer one day.Ý And then I could say that I met the guy who cured cancer.Ý Because you are dedicated to what you do.Ý Donít let anyone take that away from you, man.Ý Nobody.

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ Iím just a drunk bastard.Ý Iím sorry about cussing again.Ý I didnít mean it.Ý But I did mean it.Ý I am a drunk bastard.Ý But you guys are dedicated to taking care of us.Ý You guys were studying while I was getting drunk and stoned.Ý Not that I get high anymore.Ý There was that one time, but I swear I will never do this again.Ý But you guys must have studied all the time to be doctors. ÝNot saying that you guys donít like to have fun.Ý Iím sure you do have a great time.Ý You were probably homecoming king and the captain of your football team.

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ I know that I said this the last time was here, but this time I mean it.Ý I swear I will never do this again.Ý Last time I was like, ìokay Iím a little drunk but Iíll be better tomorrowî but I knew that I would start drinking again.Ý Not that I knew I was going to drink, but I didnít feel like I feel this time.Ý This time I know that there is no way that I will pick up another bottle in my life.Ý Nope, youíre looking at a changed man.Ý From tomorrow on, Iím toeing the line.Ý Iím going to stop drinking.

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ Hey thanks for everything that you have done for me.Ý I donít want to sound sappy or anything, but you are the best.Ý You are the best, man.Ý I know that we just met, but I feel like Iíve known you all my life.Ý And knowing that there are people like you out there makes me sure that I will stop drinking this time.Ý Well maybe just a little on special occasions.Ý You know, I mean who doesnít drink on New Yearís or birthdays or Arbor Day, or a little on weekends.Ý I mean Iím sure Iíll have like a beer or two, but you wonít see me like this ever again.Ý I mean I might just get shit-faced once a year or so just for old times sake, but not like I have been doing.

 

ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ Well, itís time for me to go.Ý So thanks, man.Ý You really changed my life.Ý And I guarantee that I will never do this again.